Saturday, February 20, 2010


***** update *****

I woke up this morning in even more pain than usual. Also felt sick and hot, so I took my temp, only to find out that I had a fever of 100.7

This afternoon, my right kidney started to hurt. Now it hurts BADLY and constantly.

I finally called the nurse line to the cleve clinic, and was told the inevitable: go to the ER. And don't wait longer than 4 hours to go. Apparently it is a very bad sign that I have a fever and what feels like a kidney infection while being on antibiotics. 3.5 days of antibiotics.

I so don't want to go. Yesterday was the first day that I got to stay at home. I just want to get a break and relax in my own bed.

At least Chan can go with me to the ER so Keith can stay home with sick baby girl.
Thank goodness she is here. I don't believe in much more than fate or coincidence, but something somewhere worked things out so that she could be here to take care of me, and just in the nick of time.

***** end update *****

Yesterday, I finally got Keith to go down "there" and clean me up and inspect the damage. I have been having an awful amount of pain in my perineum, and I asked him to take a look.
After wiping me with some baby wipes, he took a look. What he found there was shocking, even to me. The area between my vagina and rectum? Is split in half. I have an open wound. It's like an episiotomy that has not been stitched up.

So, I googled the rectocele procedure that the doctors did, and holy hell...I had no idea. Go ahead. Take a look. No wonder I have been too swollen to pee. No wonder I hurt like hell down there. I cannot believe my surgeons never explained what they were going to be doing to me. I was totally unprepared for this.

But doesn't explain the split in my perineum. I'm not quite sure who to ask about this. My surgeons aren't returning my phone calls. Nobody will answer my questions. I don't know if this is something to ask my new urologist about.

I'm just confused.

For now, I will keep the wound clean and put neosporin on it.
My hysterectomy seems to be healing up pretty well. I just have an ungodly amount of pain in my perineum and bladder. I woke up this morning unable to move from the pain.
I hope this goes away before I run out of pain meds.

Getting depressed by this stuff. I'm so glad Keith has been home with me and Chloe is here to give me a million hugs.

Chantel is coming out today to stay with us for a few days. We really need some help around the house, since I'm totally useless right now. Keith also needs help caring for Chloe and I bc she is sick, too. =(

Poor girl. I'm hoping things look up soon. Very soon.


  1. Good lord honey, I am so sorry that it just gets worse and worse. :( Hoping with all my heart that things start improving, and that you start feeling better. Sending you tons of virtual hugs...

  2. I am shaking reading need a lawyer, immediately, and a Doctor who will correctly repair this. (Don't let the same surgeon touch you!!!) That open wound will not go away, and neosporin is not enough. You could end up with much much more damage from infection, or from a whole lot of other problems.

    Please insist on getting help, if you have to phone your insurance 20x s or go to another ER do it.

    But don't let this stand.

  3. Holy hell. Those aren't surgeons, those are butchers.
    Someone needs to sit down with you and explain EXACTLY what's going on.
    And I agree with Aurelia. Time to lawyer up... that doc wouldn't have been so hell bent the other day in doing damage control if they hadn't royally fucked up.

    I'm so glad Chantel's coming out for a few days to look after you guys. You don't need to be worrying about that too. You need to be focusing on your recovery.

    Love you lots and sending lots of hugs.

  4. Definately speak to the Cleveland Clinic Urologist. If it is not something he can address, he can refer you to the right specialist who can. You absolutely need a lawyer, but first and foremost you need to get better. The Clinic has a same day appointment policy...If you have a problem getting in let me know... my job is to help people get into appointments. So sorry that this happened to you. It is just awful!

  5. Okay, I'm not clicking that because, gag reflex is already high. BUT, I can imagine, and I'm so frustrated for you.

    So happy Chantel is going to get to see you today. I really hope having a friend and some extra help around the house is just what you need.

    Keith? Sounds like an amazing guy.

    And give Chloe extra hugs for me.


  6. I'm echoing the "lawyer up" call. Call your doc at CC and get in there to get fixed up and get everything documented. Dr. Fazio in Womans Health at CC is awesome - he might be able yo help out and document how bad Metro screwed up.

  7. dude, so i clicked on the link... and then my eyes welled up with tears and i had to click back to your post and not look anymore.

    THAT IS SOOOOOOOO FUCKED UP. and the fact that you are so confused about it all in terms of who did what and who is responsible for fucking up different portions of your body... this is so beyond nuts.

    so glad chantel is there with you to give you all of our love. lots of us are thinking of you constantly.

    continue documenting EVERYTHING.

    keith is a rock star.

    hope c lo is on the mend soon, cuz i imagine all you want to do is snuggle with your babe.

    xoxo love.

  8. OMG Sara.

    I simply cannot imagine.

    I love you. Wish I was there with you.

    Glad Chan is there with you!

  9. I am so sorry that this has happened to you. All the people that are telling you to take action are exactly right. Once you get better, do after them with everything you have. Get a killer lawyer and make sure that these butchers don't hurt anyone else.

    In the meantime, take care, let yourself heal and be well. I am thinking of you.

  10. Oh hun, this just gets worse and worse. I completely agree with everyone else, DOCUMENT EVERYTHING, and find someone to fix the damage asap so you can start healing, I would say the urologist should be able to refer you to someone good. Once you are feeling better find yourself a lawyer and make sure that quack never does this to anyone else ever again.

    Ugh, I just feel sick for you. Love and hugs sweetie.

  11. Chantel is so freaking AWESOME. I so wish I was closer so I could give you and Keith some help. You just rest and try to get well.

  12. I hope you get good and solidly on the road to health soon! I'll be thinking healing thoughts for you!

  13. I don't even know what to say, words fail at this.

    Get pictures; yes I know it sounds horrifying but you need pictures of what Drs. Butcher, Batter & Bruise have done to you for your lawyers and future medical care.

    I am so very sorry that you are having to deal with this.

  14. This whole thing is a freaking mess. And I kind of want to shake someone on your behalf. A lot of someones.

  15. I'm so horrified by what you're going through. I wish there was some magic dust I could send you to make it all better.

  16. You poor thing - don't know if this matters or not, but you'll be in my prayers.

  17. I love checking my comments daily. I immediately feel a bit better. Again, thank you EVERYBODY for your kind words, thoughts, and prayers.

  18. Oh my goodness honey! I am jet catching up and I am so sorry all of this has been happening to you. I hope it all gets better really soon, that your Drs get their heads out of their asses and give you the care you damn well Need and deserve! You, the b/f and C Lo are in my thoughts and prayers!!!

  19. I wish I could do something/anything to take the tiniest bit of your pain away. I was told I should have a hysterectomy soon and I'm scared to death. My heart aches for you and I pray for you every day. How's CLO feeling?

  20. You poor sweetheart. I'm so sorry you had to go through all of this. Have you looked into the hospital strength dermoplast spray? That might be able to offer you some relief with your tear. <3