Monday, December 21, 2009

A little help from my friends

Mamas! Mamas!

Calling all mamas!

I need H E L P!

K, here is the scoop:

Chloe will not go to sleep until well after midnight. Usually closer to 1 am. She is completely wide awake, and plays and plays until she finally just succumbs to the sandman and closes those pretty little eyes of hers.

I can't keep staying up so late. I need (NEED) at least an hour to myself before I go to sleep. To decompress. Unwind. Just be quiet and read for a bit. But with C lo going to sleep at 1, I find myself staying away until 2 or 3 just to get that alone time in.

I have to find a way to get her to sleep earlier. I don't care if it is even 11:30, I just need it to be before midnight.

The pertinent info:

Chloe sleeps in bed with me. She hates HATES HATES her crib and will not even let me set her in it for a second, awake or asleep. She never used to mind sleeping in it when she was smaller, but with her reflux, ALTE history and everything, we just kept her in bed with us so we could keep an eye on her at all times. And then...well, I just liked having her in bed next to me. Now? Co-sleeping is what we do, and it is a-ok by me.

Wake up happens for us around 9 am. We wake up, we cuddle in bed and watch a video together while she has a bottle, and then we start our day.

Naptime takes place between 2-4 pm. Never any later, sometimes a little bit earlier or not as long. She sleeps wherever for her nap. The couch, chair, pack & play at grandmas. Yesterday she didn't even take a nap and she was still awake until after 12:30 am.

We actually go to bed around 10 pm. I make a warm bottle, change her into her pajamas and feed her with the lights off while cuddling with her. Sometimes she just lays next to me and eats quietly. Regardless, she'll pop right up after and start playing in bed. Even with the lights off. For 3 hours. Yeah. Sadface.

I think that's it. If you need any more info, please let me know.

Based upon all this info, what can you suggest for me to do to get her to sleep earlier? I'm getting frazzled, and have bad insomnia myself, so when I stay up *past* my natural bedtime, I have a very very hard time falling asleep.

I'll take whatever you've got. Just throw those ideas at me.

Thank you mamas!


  1. We are cosleeping family too. But with both girls around 11 months they were done being in bed with us.Maybe she just wants her own space?

  2. babe, i love you... but you gotta get her out of your bed. like any transition, it's going to suck your will to live for around 3-4 days. so yeah, she'll HATE her crib and let you know it. and you'll feel like an awful mother. and then all of a sudden she will sleep. like really sleep. and so will you.

    we're not a co-sleeping family (obviously) but definitely went through a stage with jackson where he wanted to be rocked for a solid 30 minutes before being put in his crib. then after 30 minutes, something would wake him, he'd fart or hear the dog, and whatever woke him would send him into a screaming lunatic frenzy. so we would go back in, rock and repeat.

    we did this for months. until we let him cry it out. and it sucked. but it had to be done and it was the right thing for us.

    keep in mind, you are recovery from surgery, and you have another one to go in a few weeks.

    you asked for the advice... mine is to nip this in the bud asap. 3-4 days... get earplugs, sleeping aids, booze...

    good luck!

  3. I'm with Nic. Time A bedtime routine is a must for us! We pretty much run like clock work every night, but we're not so strict that we can't bend the routine, etc. She didn't go to bed until 10pm last night, when she's normally down at 8pm.

    We co-slept for Addison's first few months, but then it became like what you've time. Once we moved her into her crib (which totally sucks), we were all much much happier.

    There will be lots of tears (from both of you) and guilt (from you), but I swear it gets better even when it might seem like it won't.

    Be strong! You can do this, Mama!

  4. We didn't do the whole co-sleeping thing so I don't know for sure what the best approach is, but I think I'm with Nic and Katrina. The best thing is going to be getting her into her own bed (crib) so she can sleep on her own and go down earlier so you can get more sleep (and her too). Like Nic said, it'll suck for a few days, maybe more, but it'll pass and in the end you'll have a baby and a mama both getting more sleep.

    Hang in there, love and hugs. We're here for you.

  5. I obviously have no advice to give, even my much younger siblings all slept in their cribs so I don't even have a reference from that time in my early teen years. You're in my heart, though, and I know you'll figure out what is best for you both. Good luck, love.

  6. Thanks mamas. I put her in her crib tonight at 10. She actually did pretty well. A lot of crying, some dry heaves, and many screams later, she is sleeping soundly.

    I expected hours. It took less than 30 minutes.

    I really miss her in bed tho =(

  7. You can do this! We had huge problems with our first... we co-slept for a while and we just didn't figure out how to stop it gracefully... now we're still having some sleep problems at 3.5yrs. don't let it go that far! yikes!

    She probably does need the crib... I was going to suggest putting the crib mattress on the floor or in a pack and play or something to keep her contained after your bedtime routine, but your comment says the crib worked so yay!!!

    I've found that a slightly longer bedtime routine, though I didn't want to extend it, worked much better than trying to rush towards bedtime. Even if it takes us an hour to get to bed because the routine goes on FOREVER, they go to sleep faster when we hit every mark. Kids used to go to sleep around 11pm, but we've managed to creep it back over the last year or so to 8:15pm! yay!

    You can do it!

  8. we were up running around until 10:30 tonight. we got home, i gave her a bottle and fresh diaper, and put her to bed. she was asleep in 5 mins flat.

    i'm amazed!

  9. Woo hoo!! I'll bet you can get her to bed BEFORE 10 too!! Hello momma time!

  10. Hope it continues to go well. You deserve the rest. :)

  11. Now that she's in the crib start moving bed time up 15 min at a time - and get more mama time. Shoot for 9 or earlier. Good luck!

  12. Hey..I understand what it is like to have a night owl for a little girl... Kyra can still be bright eyed and bushy tailed at 12:30 at night it's just not normal.. She can out last her brother any night and still be in a great mood. But since she came out she has been a night owl. We did the whole co sleeping thing until she was 6 months old and she just thrashed around to much we had the hardest time trying to get her to sleep at night in her crib when she finally made the transition. But the key was a bedtime routine. And we just kept at it.. And she finally got it. She goes to bed great now that she is two. But she still HAS to have the same routine every night or she won't go to sleep. Hope your sweet girl starts sleeping... =-)

  13. Hey Mama! I know how you feel. My little girl is only 7 months but she also HATES HATES HATES her crib and sleeps with me in bed. Its the ONLY way I get any sleep at all. I would agree with the bedtime routine though. If nothing else we read a story, take an long warm bath and put bedtime lotion on. She LOVES rubdowns! I lay in bed with her until she falls asleep, the longest it would ever take is 30 minutes but sometimes its only 5. I hope this helps! Mamas NEED their sleep!

  14. I have no advice but I just wanted to say that I TOTALLY need my hour or so of chill time after the baby goes to bed. NEED. Even when she was tiny and I was so sleep deprived without that detox time I was not a happy person. So yeah... I totally get that dilemma.